How Not to Be a Friend

My previous post told how to be a friend. In this country song, the guy is trying to be a friend, but falls short. You just don't tell someone, "Sounds like life... You've got to suck it up." That isn't how you jump in the stew of life with/for someone.

How to Be a Friend

Our neighbors are in the process of finding a home for their dog Margaret. Margaret is a huge, old, Basset Hound. Lorelei, our neighbors' daughter, woke up Margaret and Margaret bit her on the lip. Margaret hasn't lived there since biting Lorelei, but the decision was made that Margaret can't come back home. Margaret has been staying at Lorelei's grandma's.

Today Lorelei came over just to say "hi" to Alina, but didn't want to stay and play. After telling us that they would be finding a new home for Margaret, she refused to cry. I could see her forcing herself not to. She said that she just wanted to go back home. As she was leaving, Alina said, "You can come to my room and color a picture of Margaret if you want to." Lorelei said, "I think I'll stay."

Alina is such a sweet friend, and did what every friend should do when there is heartache. She didn't try and ignore it or chance the subject. She didn't tell Lorelei that everything would be okay. Alina didn't talk about what a good dog, or bad dog, Margaret was. She simply walked with her friend gently into the pain.

Many of us have been told to get over our pain. Many of us have been told to "suck it up." How often have we longed for a friend that would just be with us during the hurt and sadness? That is how the healing happens.

Theology Meets Football

Yes, it's terrible. Yet, it's hilarious!

Pulleys

As mentioned in another post, I hadn't been riding very much. But, as of late I have been able to get out to mountain bike once or twice per week. The few times when I did get out last year I noticed that when I would put some additional pressure and torque on the pedals there would be a little rear gear slippage. As I have been riding more over the last few weeks the slipping had become bad, beyond something I could comfortably ignore. I had been trying to remedy the situation by making small cable adjustments on the fly. That was no longer working either.

While we were still living in Grand Rapids I had the courage to begin wrenching my bike myself. The time that it would take a bike ship mechanic to fix it, as well as the cost, made it worth it to fix it myself. The Park Tool repair site became a great companion.

For this problem with the slipping gears I took a good, hard look at the rear deraileur. The rear deraileur still seemed to have good spring tension. This was a financial relief because a rear deraileur that is constructed to withstand the dirt, consistent shifting, and beating of hard mountain biking can be anywhere between $129 and $275. My hunch was that the two rear deraileur pulleys were worn. Upon further examination, the pulleys were worn to the point where they looked like pulley in the middle. Now, one would think that is what you would want your pulley to look like. One would guess that the star points and groove would make a great place for the bike chain to ease into for the ride around the pulley. But, that isn't the case at all. The points––called shark toothing, which can also happen on your front chain rings as well as they wear–– actually cause slipping because there is little surface area taking up the gap in the chain's link. So, I went to my local Performance Bike store in Seattle, and bought a package of two Fortè pulleys. I used my 3mm hex wrench to remove the old and pulleys and had the two new pulleys installed within a matter of minutes. I rode it hard last Monday and again Saturday with Sam. No slipping. Shifting was as smooth as silk, making for a great, worry-free ride.

Lucky Them

"Lucky them." At (Re)Orientation, that phrase was used to describe a MHGS family. The student was preparing for her internship. She, along with her husband and kids, would have to leave their church community in order for her to do her internship at a new church. "Lucky them" was used because they got to experience the heartache of their calling.

Many students have left a community to come to MHGS. Our family experienced the (mis)fortune of leaving community in order to come to Seattle. That continues to be heart wrenching. We miss those relationships terribly. But, after two years we are finally stepping into community here. We have been invited to dinner so many times in the last couple of months. We have been lucky to enter heartache with those we've come to know here.

And, then there is the Lucky Me of my internship. I have heard so many hard, tragic stories. I don't want to just show up at internship and hope someone comes to my office. I have been intentional since the first day of being in community with them. I stepped out my comfort zone and go to the cafeteria with them instead of eating a sack lunch alone in my office. I go to community group with them. I greet them at the beginning of the day and throughout the day with a handshake and a "glad to see you." I walk through the building and talk to the guys. When I graduate I want to be in community with people. I don't just want an office and see people once a week. I want to do life with people.

In return for doing my internship this way, I hear the tragic stories. It has been hard to leave those stories behind. I bring them home and suffer with them. Many students and professors have said that I need to care for myself and learn to leave them at my internship site. Yes, but. But, being in community causes me to carry stories with me, and carrying those stories is part of being human. Lucky me! And I mean that with all my heart. There is no place I would rather be doing my internship. I love the people that I am suffering with.

Giving Up Icy Yummy Goodness?

I think I may be giving up Icy Yummy Goodness. Well, at least store bought. It just doesn't taste good any more. I have fallen in love with Jean's homemade ice cream. My delicate palate just can't go back. Store ice cream has become blah and tasteless. Jean's ice cream has spoiled me. It's so delicious!

Sextant

The sextant is a tool used in navigation. I am a self-declared cartographer and an explorer. At (Re)Orientation, our school's president talked about how a sextant's user looked to the heavens in order to orient him or herself to the earth. It is a great metaphor. How do I look to God to orient myself to the world around me?

Bacon and Turtle Burgers

My friend L-O-V-E-S bacon. The other day I sent him this Jim Gaffigan YouTube video about bacon.


He gave me a bacon recipe––Turtle Burgers:
Here's a new twist on how to serve burgers.

Handmade ground beef patties, topped with sharp cheddar cheese, wrapped in a bacon weave, then the next step, add hotdogs as the heads, legs with slits for toes and tail.

Next step. Place on an oven rack, covered loosely with foil and baked for 20-30 minutes at 400 degrees. A little crispy, not too crunchy.

Garage Sales

Jean and I came across several big finds as we combed the area garage sales Friday and Saturday. Jean's treasures were two super large sheet cake pans, a metal bowl, and pot large enough for her country boil!

I found a kerosene heater at the rotary club's sale. It was listed for $22.50. One of the men helping with the sale was very kind. After starting it for me he said I could have it for $10. No arguments here. I am not quite sure when I will be needing it, but it was one of those items I couldn't pass up. Maybe it was the dream of working on something in the garage in the winter time, combined with the fond memories of gathering with the guys at the barn after orienteering and Bible study as we stood around eating Doritos and cookies telling stories and laughing.

Not pictured: Sam's incredible deal of the day––a pogo stick for $1.50!

The Food Vendor

On Tuesdays I have a class at school from 10-12, then I walk the 1.3 miles from MHGS to my internship. As I walked to my internship site, I saw this food vendor wagon. Yes, it looks like a metal pig with sunglasses. It is very intriguing. I want to try the food sometime, but I'm not sure if it is because vehicle is so cool looking or because it is so hideous.

Reading Partner

Everyone needs a reading partner. My reading partner happens to be Moose.

School Resumes

This week school resumed for me. I have also started my internship, which is a major component of my final year. I have heard so many stories of tragedy already, with a common theme of being abandoned by a father, alcohol and drug use, and prison time. So heart breaking.

The kids also began school this week. Alina is now a 1st grader, and Sam is a 4th grader. They are so cute, and SO BIG!